Last Tuesday, I had carpal tunnel surgery on my left hand. I’ve had pain in both hands for years but I put off treatment afraid of losing use of my hands while healing, hoping alternative therapies would work. The pain and loss of dexterity made the decision for me.
The surgery was fast. Painlessly I drove myself home. Then the lidocaine wore off. My nerves screamed to life. And lessons were ready to be learned. I’ve never been the type to meditate. I’ve never been able to calm my mind. I relax by doing something creative.
I learnt it is okay to do nothing. I learnt being helped is lovely. I learnt it’s never a good idea to do brioche knitting with a messed up hand, though I kind of knew that.
So I am resting with my healing achy left hand and my regular achy right hand. Every once in a while I do too much and the pain tells me to stop, to give myself time, to rest. I can’t wait until after the surgeries and I’m healed but I’ll carry the permission to stop forward.
I hope you are on the mend. I can relate to how illness and bodily maladies interfere with functioning but also provide a new lens for perceiving reality. Living that reality is not always easy. But healing is indeed a miracle. May this day find you blessed.